EP 31- The Most Effective Way to Dominate Life

As an athlete, being told to rest is one of the last things that we want to hear. Typically, if there is something wrong in my life, I react by working harder. But when I got my concussion,  my doctor told me that the fastest way to get back on the pitch was to do nothing. So I headed his advice. And the craziest thing happened. I loved it…

“My pure happiness stemmed from tapping into that presence. From being exactly where I was. Unconcerned about what I “had to do” to set me up for success. I did things because I felt like it, because they elevated my well-being, and I trusted that the mental break would get me back on the field sooner.

This joy didn’t come from just relaxing. I have had plenty of “recovery days” over the years. It stemmed from being exactly where I was, and no where else.

Nature has this nonjudgmental way of awakening my soul. It happens when I’m around authentic people, and when I’m immersed in a soccer game. I am more alive and see the world brighter.”

Share the love

If you haven’t already, I would be so very grateful if you rated and left me a review of the podcast. It takes two minutes! Here’s what to do.

1. Click HERE

2. Click “view in itunes”

3. Click the “ratings and reviews” tab

4. Click “write a review” and show me love <3

Resources

Click HERE to become a part of Friday Feelz

Click HERE for a list of the 10 books I believe ever female athlete MUST read.

Click HERE  to be the first to know when a new podcast or article drops, and receive other exclusive content

EP 25- Arrow Tip Tuesday: Why Making your Bed Changes the World

I never used to understand people who made their bed. Why bother taking the time when you are going to be getting back in and making it messy at the end of the day anyways?

As I mentioned in episode 17 in the article I wrote, Throwing Away 9 Trash Bags of Clothes Changed my Life, I am inherently a slob and tend to be suspicious of those whose living space smell of Windex and resembles a vacated crime scene. .

What are they trying to hide??

But, awhile back I read a quote from Commander Navy Seal, William H Mcraven, that peaked my feathers.

“If you want to to change the world, start off by making your bed. If you make your bed every morning, you will have accomplished the first task of the day. It will give you a small sense of pride, and it will encourage you to do one task and then another. And by the end of the day that one task completed will have turned into many tasks completed and It will reinforce the idea that the little things in life matter.”

Ohhh snapp. Did he just equate making your bed with changing the world??

I’m down to change the world, so I figured it was worth a shot.

I did. And now I always, always, always make my bed. Here’s why:

Charles Duhigg, author of bestseller The Power of Habit, calls this kind of habit, a “keystone habit” because it creates a positive change that will then set in motion your ability to perform other good behaviors.

Once I make my bed, it symbolizes that my day is starting, and it is my first opportunity to demonstrate that I am taking control of my day.

There are so many uncertainties in life. Even if you begin the day with the best intentions, things can go sideways fast.

You could slip on a banana peel on the way to training, get side swiped in your car,  yelled at by your coach, miss the game-winning shot…. the possibilities are endless.

But, no matter how crappy your day is, when you come home and all you want to do is sleep, you will see that at the very least you made your bed. Not all is lost.

It’s such a small habit, but  I am learning that I am a highly visual person. If I see a distraction in the my outer life, I’m going to feel off internally. So making my bed is one action I can take to help me reduce that stress.

Also, think about when you stay at a hotel. When I am traveling with my team and enter my hotel room, I get giddy when I see the bed covers are tucked in crispier than a newly minted dollar bill.  Sometimes I do think the covers are so snug they make me feel like I’m going going to lose circulation, however that’s just a personal preference. The beauty about making your own bed, is you call the shots.

If you’re a science-based person, a recent study showed  “71 percent of bed makers consider themselves happy, while 62 percent of non-bed-makers admit to being unhappy. Bed makers are also more likely to enjoy their jobs, own a home, exercise regularly, and feel well rested, whereas non-bed-makers hate their jobs, rent apartments, avoid the gym, and wake up tired.”

There’s something to be said about making beds.

Arrow Tip: Make your bed

If you still feel you are too lazy to make your bed, then here’s a video on how to make your bed while you are still in it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nD8y1kRpMqw

No excuses to at least try it! if you don’t like it, you can go back to crumpled sheets.

Do you make your bed? Does it make you feel as happy as me? Let me know in the comments

Share the love

If you haven’t already, I would be so very grateful if you rated and left me a review of the podcast. It takes two minutes! Here’s what to do.

1. Click HERE

2. Click “view in itunes”

3. Click the “ratings and reviews” tab

4. Click “write a review” and show me love <3

Resources

Click HERE to become a part of Friday Feelz

Click HERE for a list of the 10 books I believe ever female athlete MUST read.

Click HERE  to be the first to know when a new podcast or article drops, and receive other exclusive content

EP 22- Arrow Tip Tuesday: Create A Morning Ritual

Morning people. My college self just threw up in my mouth a little bit. As a teenager, if I had to wake up before my body felt ready, the entire world was dead to me. I walked around with a blank stare, wishing that a UFO would fly down, lasso every human who attempted to talk to me, and transport them to Mars, until I woke up on my own terms.

Legitimately, if someone greeted me with a “hi, good morning!” I’d think how dare you have the audacity to say such a thing to me before 10am.

But then, after college, I read an article by this dude name Hal Elrod. He mentioned that the single biggest contributor to his success in life was having a morning routine.

What?? Is this guy for real?

He brought up an idea, that rattled my morning-hating 10x snooze-button hitting self.

He said that every time you wake up, and hit the snooze button, you’re essentially, saying “I hate getting up, so let me do it over and over and over again.”

Wow. Truth. I am voluntarily re-living the most unenjoyable part of my day.

Since then, I’ve researched highly impactful athletes and people in this world, and have noticed that the majority of them all have some variation of a consistent morning ritual.

And it makes sense. Our days are filled with uncontrollable factors.  Once our day gets rolling, it’s so easy to get caught up being reactive. We get a text from a friend, we show up to training and our coach tells us what to do, we respond to all our piled up emails ..…by the end of the day, it can leave us feeling drained as if we never took time to ourself.

But the start of the day, is something we can always control. In implementing a morning ritual, we are able to start the day on our own terms. It’s an opportunity to show ourselves that we value our well-being and are in control of our lives. Once you find a ritual that feels good to you, it allows you to start the day off feeling alive, and excited to crush the rest of your day.

For the past four years, I’ve been tweaking my own routine, and have developed one that get’s me feeling like I’m Cinderella and that Prince Charming just returned my glass slipper.

Throughout the next few weeks, I’m going to walk you through my exact morning ritual that gets me into this enlightened state. Every one is different, but there’s a few main components that I believe will set you up for your day, and at the very least, make you not want to hit snooze, or hit anyone who tries to say “good morning!” to you before you’re fully ready.

Arrow Tip: Create A Morning Ritual

Specific details to follow in the future

Share the love

If you haven’t already, I would be so very grateful if you rated and left me a review of the podcast. It takes two minutes! Here’s what to do.

1. Click HERE

2. Click “view in itunes”

3. Click the “ratings and reviews” tab

4. Click “write a review” and show me love <3

Resources

Click HERE to become a part of Friday Feelz

Click HERE for a list of the 10 books I believe ever female athlete MUST read.

Click HERE  to be the first to know when a new podcast or article drops, and receive other exclusive content

EP 19- Arrow Tip Tuesday: Find an Accountablity Partner

Accountability partners for goals are what butter is to coffee, or what collagen is to bone broth or, what cacao nibs are to goat yogurt…you know what I’m saying?? Okay maybe not, if you aren’t as fond of these concoctions as I am. But for real, accountability partners are the bees knees.

An accountability partner is someone you join forces with to hold one another responsible for your respective intentions.

(Side note: In the past, the term  “goals”  have signified too much rigidity, as I tended to put too much focus on the end result. I like to use the word “intentions”, because it reminds me that the end results are something to aspire to, but they do not define me. It allows me to fully enjoy the process. That’s just my preference, but you can use whatever word you want: goal, intention, result, outcome etc.)

This past offseason, Arrow Liver, professional goalkeeper, and diving-header goal legend Michelle Betos  and I were accountability buddies. Each week, we emailed each other what went well in our training, and what we wanted to improve the following week.  We chose tasks that we typically struggled to complete on our own, and just needed a little extra push.   

One week, my focus was to get back in to the habit of documenting and reflecting upon all of my workouts. Another week, Michelle wanted to improve her ball striking technique. That week, she sent me a text of her foot taped up. Most humans, tape their ankle if it’s injured, but Michelle’s ligaments were fully intact. She taped her foot  in order to recondition her brain to strike the ball with her foot in that specific position. That’s Michelle Betos for you. If you haven’t listened to her full podcast , that’s not the craziest thing she’s done to improve her game.  

A few weeks after we started this accountability thread, I saw an incredible stat:

A study conducted at Dominican University of California showed that people who wrote down their intentions, shared with a friend, and sent weekly updates to that friend were on average 33% more successful in accomplishing their stated intentions than if they were to keep them to themselves.

Woahhhh. That’s a ⅓  greater likelihood of crushing your dreams!!

Accountability partners are effective because when you tell someone else your intentions, they become more than just about you. This person serves as a greater reason to follow through on the action. Also, this gives you someone who is supportive of you and equally invested in pursuing their own visions. Plus, even if your desired outcomes are different, it’s way more fun to salsa dance together to your dreams.

Arrow Tip:  Find an Accountability Partner

1. Find a mate you trust, who will keep you honest, and agrees to be your accountability partner

2. Converse about your intentions and the actions you want to take to meet them

3. Set-up the specific actions you will take, and create general timeline for when you will accomplish them 

4. Check in with each other once a week, in person, via text, email, phone etc.

5. Celebrate the progress! Fist bump each other each time you make a gain.

Do you have an accountability partner? Have they helped you make moves in life? Let me know!

Share the love

If you haven’t already, I would be so very grateful if you rated and left me a review of the podcast. It takes two minutes! Here’s what to do.

1. Click HERE

2. Click “view in itunes”

3. Click the “ratings and reviews” tab

4. Click “write a review” and show me love <3

Resources

Click HERE to become a part of Friday Feelz

Click HERE for a list of the 10 books I believe ever female athlete MUST read.

Click HERE  to be the first to know when a new podcast or article drops, and receive other exclusive content

EP 17- Throwing Away 9 Trash Bags Full of my Belongings Changed my Life

Not to brag, but growing up, I played on some pretty baller teams. With stellar teams, came our fair share of tournament championships. And with tournament championships, came a lot of free tournament championship t-shirts.

Winning free garments is infinitely more exciting as a kid than if you bought it yourself. For about a week, I would be high as a kite repping my new swag. My friends and I would ecstatically plan a certain day to wear our shirts to school. “Ok guys, on Wednesday’s let’s all wear our Chinook Cup Champions shirts!”

 After that day, without fail, the shirt would be chucked into the back of my closet with all of the other virtually identical uncomfortable stiff-materialed, generic-fonted, cheesy soccer ball-adorned tournament t-shirts.  

And then 10 years later, at the age of 25, when I still have a room at my parents place because I’m a professional soccer player, who happens to be female #equalplayequalpay….that’s when I realized I’ve been hoarding these t-shirts for my whole life.

The only reason I discovered my hoarding problem is because I read this book called The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up

And, dare I say it, for a slob like myself,  it was indeed life changing.

I swear, tidiness makes  your head feel so much clearer and freer, especially when you get home after a long day of training. I believe any amount of stress, even it’s outside of the game, will affect your performance.

I posted before and after pictures of my room  in the full written piece HERE .  The insane amount of wardrobes I collected is equally shocking and impressive.If you are a fellow slob, I urge you to check this book out. At the time of reading the book, my messiness didn’t bother me, but once I went through this process and was living in a tidy place, I never wanted to go back.

30 DAY CHALLENGE to win Free Gift!

If anyone tries out the “kon marie” method described in this piece within the next 30 days (By May 6, 2017)  I’ll send you a free gift. All you have to do is send me a before and after picture of your room  (you can see an example of pic from the written piece HERE attach full written article link ) . Send me the pictures of the before and after via social media @arrowliving   or email me @arrowliving1@gmail.com and I’ll send you that gift.

Share the love

If you haven’t already, I would be so very grateful if you rated and left me a review of the podcast. It takes two minutes! Here’s what to do.

1. Click HERE

2. Click “view in itunes”

3. Click the “ratings and reviews” tab

4. Click “write a review” and show me love <3

Resources

Click HERE to become a part of Friday Feelz

Click HERE for a list of the 10 books I believe ever female athlete MUST read.

Click HERE  to be the first to know when a new podcast or article drops, and receive other exclusive content

EP 16- Arrow Tip Tuesday: How To Bounce Back After A Bad Game

Last week I played in my first game at Providence Park since my concussion. It was just a preseason game, bt I had been waiting 18 months for that moment. Last year, I watched our games up in our team suite. I had to wear earplugs because the noise of the crowd gave me a throbbing headache. Also, tracking my teammates zig-zagging runs invoked neck tension and nausea. By the end of the games, I felt over-stimulated, as if I’d actually participated in the match myself.

My first game playing on Providence Park was a big milestone. I trotted onto the field, feeling a tidal wave of adrenaline and gratitude. Holy crap we out here doin this thanggg! That ecstasy lasted for about 10 seconds, then I was submersed into the game.

35 minutes later, the whistle blew and the game was over.

Our team won. I played my first minutes since my concussion. Yet, instead of being happy, I was swallowing back tears.  A rational minded human would think that coming back from an 18 month injury is an incredible feat. But as a lifelong competitive athlete, my performance, in my mind, wasn’t good enough.

I know this is a common theme amongst athletes. We tend to be so hard on ourselves. Our mind instantly re-traces all the things we did wrong, and those feelings of frustration pile up until we think that our life is over as we know it.

But if we take a step back, and allow ourselves to really feel and process everything we realize that:

1. bad games are inevitable

2. we most often think we played a lot worse than we did.

3. even if you really suck it up, excessively drowning in our sorrows is not beneficial

Arrow Tip: How to Bounce Back after a Bad Game

Here’s 6 questions to ask after a “bad” game to get yourself back into a happy place. The key throughout all of this is to play the role of an observant, non-judgmental scientist. Take your time with each question.

1. What do I feel?

Allow yourself to feel your frustration/sadness/embarrassment and express what didn’t go well for you. I went home, screamed a few times. Kicked my legs like a needy child. And then I worded why I was frustrated…”I am pissed because I blew it. I sucked. My lungs felt like they were going to collapse, my body felt like jello , I slipped on the ball, I dove in on a tackle… Be as real as possible. Curse, punch pillows, scream…do what you gotta do, and take as long as you need, to flush out all the feelings.

1. What are my beliefs behind this feeling?

In my case:

–That was my one chance to show that I deserve to be here

-My energy sucked, I am never going to be in good enough shape to play

-My coach is going to think I suck and now I’m never going to play

-I am not a good soccer player and don’t deserve to be on this team

-to be frustrated, I have to play a game and it doesn’t go well.

1. Do I need to believe these thoughts? (Hint: The answer is always No)

1. What can I believe instead that will allow me to feel at peace with my performance?

Go through each belief, and replace it with a new beneficial belief.

In my case, I reframed:

-Bad games are an opportunity to expose weaknesses and grow

-The only way for me to be frustrated is to play a game, and not learn from it

-The fact that I’m frustrated is a good thing. It shows how much I care about my sport…it’s a good thing

-I can use this frustration as motivation, to highlight areas of improvement, and  further hone in on my craft and ball out even more

-the past does not equal the future, just because I had one bad game does not mean I have to feel frustrated

1. What went well for me in my game?

In my case:

-I played my first game back in 18 months

-I am still breathing

-my team won

-I made several clean passes

-I headed two balls without any symptoms

-I did not actually collapse a lung

This allows us to see that we were likely over-reacting, and might simply need to take a chill pill.  In our roughest games, there is always something to be grateful for. Even if it’s as simple as making through the game alive!

1.  What steps can I take to improve next game?  

Come up with a few intentions you can make to continue growing as a player.  For instance, anytime I make an error on the field, I now quickly say to myself “I love myself, onto the next one.”  Yes it’s cheesy. Yes, I actually repeat that to myself. Yes, it works wonders.

The plan can be more action oriented, as well. Examples: show up to training 20 minutes early to work on passing technique, visualize 10 minutes of defending before bed, meet with conditioning coach and put together a fitness program.

I ask myself these questions every time I have a “poor” performance,  whether it’s in a game, a training, or any area in my life. It’s a great tool, to get yourself back and motivated to be your best self. The worst thing we can do is dwell on our mistakes. We all have bad games. We all have bad days. Some of us have bad breath. There’s badness all around. But when we embrace the badness, and use it as an opportunity for growths, that’s when we reach the greatness within. And ball out.
Do you have a certain way you cope with bad games? Let me know in the comments!

Share the love

If you haven’t already, I would be so very grateful if you rated and left me a review of the podcast. It takes two minutes! Here’s what to do.

1. Click HERE

2. Click “view in itunes”

3. Click the “ratings and reviews” tab

4. Click “write a review” and show me love <3

Resources

Click HERE to become a part of Friday Feelz

Click HERE for a list of the 10 books I believe ever female athlete MUST read.

Click HERE  to be the first to know when a new podcast or article drops, and receive other exclusive content

EP 14- A Once in a Lifetime Flight-How to Deal with Losses

I’m going to be honest with you. Losing games freaking sucks. When I was younger, I would give everyone the silent treatment (except my dog),  shut my room and tell my parents to leave me alone, unless dinner was ready, of course. But as I’ve gotten older, I have lost more and more games, and I want to tell you something. Losing, actually, believe it or not….doesn’t get any better. It still SUCKS. In the heat of the moment, it feels like you’ve gotten your soul ripped out. When you fully invest your time and heart into something, and circumstances don’t turn out how you’d like, naturally it’s feels crappy.

But, a couple years ago, my team and I boarded a plane filled with World War II veterans and my my perspective of losing has changed.

Whenever I’m feeling down, from a sports loss or anything in life, I like to think back to that moment. All it takes to snap myself out of my funk to think of all of the people who have sacrificed their life for my teammates and myself to be able to live out our dreams.

There is always someone who has it worse than you. And there’s people in this world who no doubt would kill to be in your exact place now.  Even when we lose, we always have something to be grateful for. Full written article with video footage HERE. 

Share the love

If you haven’t already, I would be so very grateful if you rated and left me a review of the podcast. It takes two minutes! Here’s what to do.

1. Click HERE

2. Click “view in itunes”

3. Click the “ratings and reviews” tab

4. Click “write a review” and show me love <3

Resources

Click HERE to become a part of Friday Feelz

Click HERE for a list of the 10 books I believe ever female athlete MUST read.

Click HERE  to be the first to know when a new podcast or article drops, and receive other exclusive content

EP 13- Arrow Tip Tuesday: STOP, Collaborate, and Meditation

Arrow Tip: STOP, Collaborate, and Meditation

As athletes, our competitive drive often  trickles into other avenues of our lives. Like driving down avenues For me, whenever I used to go anywhere, I needed to get there pronto without any delays. I had zero patience for traffic and red lights were poison in my blood.

When I drive places. I always leave with just enough time to account for typical traffic, with a little buffer for unforeseen circumstances. It’s a habit, I’ve mentioned before in my blog post, The Day I Single Handedly Delayed my Flight to Australia.  I have this uncanny ability to arrive at places with seconds to spare. I’m not often late, but I show up just in the knick of time. On my journey to play overseas in Australia. I was in the wrong terminal, my flight was taking off in 30 minutes, and my savior Karina came to the rescue,  held my hand through airport security, as we weaved in and out of the crowd, and made it to fight by nothing short of a miracle.

I have that unique timeliness on a more low key level with driving.  I leave with just enough time to get me to my destination.

It’s mostly well worked for me time-wise, but sometimes it’s a recipe for emotional disaster.

For instance, I’ll be cruising to training and hit a red light. My mind reacts:

Squirrel poop! Squirrel poop? How on earth you think of squirrel poop, Kendall? On a serious note, where do squirrels poop? Why do we never see squirrel poop?

My sporadic, and intelligent inquiry, softens the blow of the first red light. But the second unanticipated red light… that’s when the internal sirens signal.  I get antsy.  As if there are literal fire ants crawling around and pinching the inside my gut.

Did I allow myself enough time to get there? Am I going to be late? Kendall you always do this, leave earlier next time!!

On green, I rev up my engine to make up a few seconds. But then I hit another red, and my face turns the shade of the light.

I hate being late. I care about peoples time. I want to show responsibility and respect others time and myself. Dang it Kendall!

Every time I hit a red light, or traffic, the ants inside of me make babies, intensifying the discomfort.

Of course, I somehow make it right on time, but with unnecessary uneasiness inside of me.

But, I’ve found a trick that have bug-sprayed the discomfort inside of me. And it’s not leaving earlier, because that would be too easy. Plus,I’m a rebel and like to live on the edge.

When we see red lights, we are conditioned to stop because we’re consciously aware that if we don’t stop, we risk harming others or ourselves, and potentially receive a ticket. We obey the red light because it’s easier than dealing with the consequences of running it.

But just as we train a dog to pee outside, I have retrained myself to view red lights to what I deem, the STOP, Collaborate and Meditation Method.

Instead of viewing red lights as the devil. I see them as resembling loving kindness, hearts, autumn leaves, Clifford the Big Red Dog, bell peppers…and all the other beautiful things in life that are red. Most importantly, I see it as an opportunity to take time for myself. Every time I hit a red light now, I connect to myself. I take a few deep breaths, and refocus my attention on the present and all the things I have to be grateful for.

It’s such a great tool for those who feel they are always going pedal to the metal in all areas of their life. Now, red lights are magic. You deserve time to yourself.

Arrow Tip: Whenever you hit a red light, think of all the things that are the color red that make you happy. Then take three deep breaths and thank the red light for allowing you to take time for yourself.

Then on green, rev up the engine to make up the time you lost. Just kidding, don’t do that. Or do. Baby steps.

Do have little patience for traffic? If so, how do you deal with it? Let me know in the comments.

Share the love

If you haven’t already, I would be so very grateful if you rated and left me a review of the podcast. It takes two minutes! Here’s what to do.

1. Click HERE

2. Click “view in itunes”

3. Click the “ratings and reviews” tab

4. Click “write a review” and show me love <3

Resources

Click HERE to become a part of Friday Feelz

Click HERE for a list of the 10 books I believe ever female athlete MUST read.

Click HERE  to be the first to know when a new podcast or article drops, and receive other exclusive content

Ep 05-Arrow Tip Tuesday:Take An Inner Bath

Welcome to the Arrow Tip Tuesday series! Every Tuesday, I provide a simple, actionable tip that you can apply to enhance your athletic endeavors and life.

Today’s Arrow Tip: Bathe Your Insides 

Have you ever stood next to someone at the gym who sprayed copious amounts of cologne or perfume on their body in an attempt to mask their odor? It’s not a pleasant sensory experience. To avoid being THAT person, most of us have developed a habit of showering. We understand that properly washing our bodies is a necessary component to our hygiene. Yet, we give so much attention to our extremities when in actuality our insides are the real MVP’s.

Properly functioning internal organs, muscles, bones, and cells are what allow us to perform every single one of our daily actions. When we sleep, our body enters metabolic maintenance mode and moves waste out of our system. Upon waking, this junk is still floating around in our system. We are also dehydrated. When we are lacking high quality hydration, our circulation starts to thin out and our blood gets congested leading to headaches and low energy.

 Drinking water right when we wake up flushes out those toxins and allow us to regain hydration. It’s such a simple way to kickstart your day and will leave you feeling revitalized and ready to Arrow Live it up.

Arrow Tip: Before hitting the hay, set a tall glass of water (24-32  ounces is clutch) near your bed. If you’re feeling fancy, spice it up with some lemon or fresh mint leaves. Then sip on that upon awaking.  Shawn Stevenson, from The Model Health Show Podcast (great podcast if you’re into health and fitness) calls this habit taking an “inner bath.”

Try it out and let me know what you think in the comments!

p.s  although I believe inner baths are superior to external cleansing, I (and your peers) still recommend showering every once in a while. But if you chose not to, that’s totally cool too. No judgements here. You do you.

Share the love

If you haven’t already, I would be so very grateful if you rated and left me a review of the podcast. It takes two minutes! Here’s what to do.

1. Click HERE

2. Click “view in itunes”

3. Click the “ratings and reviews” tab

4. Click “write a review” and show me love <3

Resources

Click HERE to become a part of Friday Feelz

Click HERE for a list of the 10 books I believe ever female athlete MUST read.

Click HERE  to be the first to know when a new podcast or article drops, and receive other exclusive content